Thursday, December 20, 2012

Y2KT10 July 1999

by: Curtis Lynch
Professor of Millennium Musicology

In case you ain’t heard, a heretofore unknown computer “bug” will wipe out all recorded music at the stroke of midnight, December 31, 1999.  Fortunately, the crack staff of scientists at Playgrounds Magazine have unearthed a method of saving ten, and only ten, pieces of music.  The way you do this is to send your selections to the address found at the end of this article.  Choose wisely, choose carefully, because we all will have to live with your selections.


The year 2000 is still six months away, but people with much more forethought than I are already making arrangements for the dawn of the new millennium. (hey, my idea of advance planning is ordering pizza from Papa John’s.)  Never mind that the 21st century doesn’t actually start until 1/1/2001; facts don’t stand a chance in the face of rampant capitalism.  To prove my point, turn of the century soirees are filling up in a hurry. I hear you can’t get a room within an overnight hike of Disneyworld, and Rolling Stone magazine reports Barbara Streisand’s Vegas concert packages are going for $1 million per. Other musical blowouts include The Eagles (masters of the overpriced concert ticket), who are teaming up with fellow 70s California mellow-rockers Jackson Browne and Linda Ronstadt to command $50-$1000 a throw, Spingsteen in New Jersey, Bowie, Phish, a Metallica/Ted Nugent Detroit double bill, and Michael Jackson, who will take advantage of the International Date Line (not to mention fans) by actually playing two New Years Eve shows. I don’t know where I’m going to be December 31st, but you can bet that if our entire civilization fails when that big ball falls, a Michael Jackson concert will not be the safest place to be.

Oh, and PC Computing magazine reminds us that we’ve already missing the conception date for a 01/01/00 baby.  Better luck next century, y’all.  

Next month, we’ll discuss exotic millennium travel destinations for those of us with more dollars than sense, but let’s move on the July’s soundtrack choices for the 21st century:

Currently snowboarding , tending bar, and following the Portland Trailblazers in the Great Northwest.

     Here it is:  in no particular order, my top-10-can't-live-without

·         Sublime  40 OZ. TO FREEDOM
·         Van Halen  FAIR WARNING
·         Harry Connick Jr.  20
·         Beck  ODELAY
·         Journey  ESCAPE
·         Tom Petty  WILDFLOWERS
·         Red Hot Chili Peppers  BLOOD,SUGAR,SEX,MAGIK
·         Jane's Addiction  NOTHING'S SHOCKING

Chris’ selections don’t include anything prior to 1980, which should give you some idea of his age, but one thing’s for sure, the 21st century will be rockin’... (By the way Chris, your prediction of the Blazers over the Spurs in the playoffs proved to be WRONG!!!) Chris turned me on to Sublime, so thanks for that, but I can’t believe he has Journey surviving Y2K!


Don’t Stop - Fleetwood Mac --It was originally our campaign song, but after I met Monica, it took on a whole new meaning...

Legalize It - Peter Tosh -- Let me make this perfectly clear. I am only in favor of it if a majority of Americans are in favor of it.  My convictions are firm.

Fixin’ to Die Rag - Country Joe & The Fish -- I just hope Country Joe doesn’t write a Kosovo protest song...

Why Don’t We Get Drunk and... - Jimmy Buffett -- Jennifer Flowers and I refer to this as “our song.”

Why Don’t We Do It in the Road - The Beatles -- Hillary and I refer to this as “our song.”

Me and Mrs. Jones - Billy Paul -- “We got a thing goin’ on...”  Need I say more?

Afternoon Delight - Starland Vocal Band -- Monica and I refer to this as “our song.”

Let’s Get It On - Marvin Gaye -- Me and that one chick, what’s her name, refer to this as “our song.”

Anything by James Brown -- The depth of his lyrics, songs like The Times They are a-changin were anthems of our generation...”oh, that was Bob Dylan?  You’re kidding!”

( I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction - Rolling Stones -- Ironic, isn’t it?

The preceding list was supplied to the Department of Millennium Musicology through a highly confidential, unnamed source which shall be protected fully under the First Amendment...unless you ask nicely.

This next list comes to us courtesy of Harold Ham, marketing specialist for Prime Financial Group.

Ten Favorite CDs to take into Y2K:

BOSTON: Boston - Just great music, drums.
DOORS: The Doors - Totally trippin’ 70s music
RUSH: Roll The Bones - an unbelievable land with only three members. Unprecedented percussion.
BASIA: Illusions - smooth, sweet jazz with a flare.
MADONNA: Immaculate Collection - This is a sampling of the young and emerging Madonna & her earliest hits. She really changed after this collection.
FLEETWOOD MAC: The Dance - A collection of their greatest hits.  They reassembled to do this.  The live concert was the best.  Tusk with the USC marching band-awesome!
CHICAGO: Greatest Hits - because they are Chicago.
BILLY JOEL:  River of Dreams - because he is “the man.” He has a passion and a fire for what he does.
VAN HALEN: 0U812 or 5150 or Best of Van Halen Vol. I- because they make great music from vocals to bass to Eddie Van Halen to drums!
HOOTIE AND THE BLOWFISH: Cracked Rear View - because they are from South Carolina, love sports, are down to earth guys, and because their music is about real life ballads.

Well, at least everyone will have heard these tunes.  I think we’re looking at a combined sixty-two kazillion units of sales from this list. Ten bonus points for including Basia, however. Smooth Jazz must survive, otherwise, how will I get to sleep at night?

OK, your turn: Send your lists, such as they are, to :

Playgrounds Magazine
P.O.Box 8154
Columbus Ga 31908

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